You know how to take the reservation

I'm in Dallas for an HP event where I have to present some materials that I did for them to 50 of their Channel Partners (Hi, No Pressure)... and when I arrived into Dallas last night at 10:45pm I trotted right over to the rental car office to then head off to Frisco to spend a few nights with one of my best friends, Mike, who I've been friends with since 6th grade.

Anyway, I was in a line behind 4 people to then hear from the guy in the front of the line that they were "out of cars." Um...I'm sorry. Can you say that again? That's like - "Hello, welcome to McDonalds. Oh I'm sorry, we're out of burgers." The staff was way less than helpful and failed to acknowledge any of our presence. We stood there, waiting...and waiting. 15 min later, nobody is helping anybody. So I march up to what looked like the manager and said "If you're out of cars, just tell us and we'll go find one elsewhere." He just couldn't admit it outloud and kept saying "Give me 2 minutes." And then he'd go stand at the back door, looking out the window I guess hoping that Jesus would parade a fleet of Ford Borings up to the door.

I just left and went to be the first in line elsewhere to find a place that had a car. Get this. In Dallas, the rack rate for a rental car is ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS PER DAY. Can you fucking believe that? And that's not all. The combined tax and fees is FIFTY PERCENT OF THE DAY RATE. So it cost me $318 to rent a car for 2 days. THANKS BUSH-LAND.

Other than that - it was so great to finally make it to Mike's place. Got here at 12:30am... but we couldn't just go to bed. We needed to laugh so we watched a couple of segments of Triumph the Insult Dog. That character is SO fucking hilarious. My favorite line is "Bon Jovi coming back to New Jersey. That's like poop crawling back up into the butthole."

Oh - and Dallas has the CRAZIEST giant highways I've ever seen. OMG. But so far, it looks like a sea of chain restaurants, strip malls, and corporate parks. So, basically, it's a great big giant Fremont. Hope to see something better before I leave.